And so I pray for special help,
to somehow understand
the subtle implications,
of each proud miaowed command.

Oh, let me not forget that chairs
were put on earth to shred;
and what I like to call a lap
is actually a cat-bed.

I know it's really lots to ask
but please, oh please, take pity;
and though I'm only human,
make me worthy of my kitty!

...Author Unknown